If WoW were Real Life

Shit would be pretty interesting if WoW were the same as real life. Some random thoughts for this Wednesday morning.

1)You could summon your car. You would have no need for a garage or parking spaces. You could just go stand in the street and summon your Toyota. You would also be able to make your car jump and spin ridiculously.

2) You would not need to eat or drink. Unless of course you wanted the plus career skills and sex appeal buff from your Grandma's chicken dumplings. You would only really need to eat after you got the crap beat out of you for tracking mud on the carpet.

3) If you died, no biggy. Just run back to your body and live again. If there is no body just run back to the place where you died and you will get a new body (equally sexy as the last one).

4) You would all be buffed and/or have a huge rack. There would be no more fatties or ugly people. We would all be really really ridiculously good looking...like Zoolander....or like Jong before he went Alliance.

5) There would be no more real jobs. You either ground meter maids and IRS employess for cash or you sold stuff on the stock market. People would stand around with a hat with an exclamation point on it if they needed something done. These people never move or change at all.....and they have the same task for everyone. Somehow they do not end up with a giant stinking barrel of East LA Crypt eyeballs sitting behind them.

6) Everyone would be homeless. And you would disappear from view when you fell asleep. When you "woke up", you would be well rested and get twice as much satisfaction from running over your third grade teacher with a Zamboni.

7) Nobody would need to go to the bathroom. Unless you ate the peanuts at the tavern....you werent supposed to eat those and must now crap them up for the next person to eat.

8) Everything would be settled with a duel. You have an arguement? Challenge them to a duel. Whoever wins is right. Since everyone is buff and equal, these would be relatively even....except the people who keyboard turn....they lose.

9) It would be funny when your friend died in some ridiculous way. Since people dont actually die, that tragic fishing accident where your friend got impaled on a whale penis is actually hilarious. Bonus laughter points if you are the one that causes them to die....such as unsummoning your Toyota when you drive off the grand canyon.

10) You could only do one dance per race. Mexicans get a salsa dance. African Americans get the MC Hammer dance. Anglo Americans do the waltz. Asians do the robot. All of them. DOMO ORIGATO MR ROBOTO.

Anyone have any additional things to add to the list of our make believe world where we get to be much bigger bamfs than IRL?